Happy Superbowl Sunday Party People!
Ok I don't want to shit all over the Super Bowl but doesn't it seem like every year we treat this more and more like a real holiday? Perhaps it is, I have a funny feeling that this will be one of those years where I don't observe this particular holiday. I think I'll quit before I go any further, I didn't jump online to bitch about a bunch of people being happy.
Yesterday was a pretty big day for me. It marks me making my first big mistake with a shoot I did for a restaurant. I won't go into any of the details but basically I wasn't as prepared as I should have been and as a result I didn't get any of the shots I wanted. Granted I got what I needed but perhaps that was the whole point in all of this, real funny God =P All kidding aside I was pretty upset at myself when I left the restaurant.
It's funny at how something that would have sent me in a depressive tailspin only a few years ago only pisses me off. I left the restaurant and needed to buy some smokes and grab a bite to eat before I met my friends at the Icehouse for a jam. I hate eating fast food these days but the only thing close was a McDonald's close to where I used to live on Indian School Rd. As I approached McSatan's burger shack I noticed that they had built a Panda Express right next to where I was heading.
Maybe it's because of all the sugar or the chicken, or the sugar coated chicken but I love me some Panda Express! I sat down to inhale my dinner which left me a little more satisfied than a value meal from next door. I opeed my fortune cookie expecting to get something that read like,"That wasn't chicken". To my suprise it said something more profound.
Focus on your Art and Creativity
It hit home with me, as did the coming indigestion. It reaffirmed my intent from a few years back which was in order to confront my destructive nature I would counter by being constructive. I can't tell you how I've salvaged some pretty horrible days in my life by writing, or painting and what not. Now it seems that was once just an effort has evolved into a fully functioning safety net from which I move forward everyday.
I then left to grab some smokes and some drunk guy was standing out front of the Circle K talking (or slurring) on the phone trying to get directions to a restaurant. Funny thing was that the place he was so desperately trying to find was two blocks away. I thought about helping him but the irony as well as the metaphor were so intense I couldn't deprive the rest of the world from seeing this. I can only hope it was as apparent to everyone else as it was to me.
As for the jam it was great! Jennie came to watch for a bit but the music was so mellow she was starting to doze off so she headed off home. We sat and talked for a bit before she left and all I can say is that I'm so glad she's in my life. I went back upstairs to the jam after she left and things started to become clearer amidst the chaos.
I found myself taking more chance than I ever had been before in this jam. Mostly because I started making up lyrics to some of the music we were creating. What this meant to me was that after all this time I think I'm starting to trust myself in the way that I've always wanted to. Is this what freedom feels like?
Till next time Party People!
Keep on a Chooglin.
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